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Scientists Debunk Popular Painting: "Dogs Can't Play Poker." |
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Torch Bearer Loses Torch in Poker Game. |
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Ribbon Wavers Tell Poker Players "It's Time to Fold." |
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| Aphrodite of Melos: Poker Beauty. |
Archaeologists on the Aegean island of Melos claim to have made an archeological find that is certain to rewrite the history books, as well as redefine poker's role in world events.
Digging in a field near the sun-bleached shores of Melos, Dr. Hawthorne Binginham of the London Museum discovered the missing arms of the world's most famous statue, Venus de Milo — or in Greek, Aphrodite of Melos.
"We expected to find the left arm holding a shield and her right arm holding a mirror so that she could admire her own beauty, so imagine our surprise when we found her holding three tens with an ace kicker in one hand and what appears to be a handful of poker chips in the other," he said, visibly exhausted from the turmoil of the historic occasion. "I think she was making a raise," he added amid a flurry of flashbulbs.
Whether known as Venus or her Greek name Aphrodite, she is the goddess of love, beauty and fertility. Her beauty is said to have caused the Trojan War. In Greek mythology, her son Eros is the God of Love and Sexual Desire. Her Roman son, Cupid, is the messenger of Love.
"The timing is uncanny," stated Jefferson Fitzsimmons from Poker In Athens headquarters. "Here we are trying to get poker into the Athens games, and the most famous lady in the world is discovered to be a poker player. And she's Greek, too!"
Mr. Fitzsimmons then made a statement that drew an audible gasp from the audience: "Perhaps she should now be known as the Goddess of Poker, or Good Luck."
After a peasant named Yorgos discovered the original statue in 1820, it was presented to King Louis XVIII. His sculptors devised arms that held apples, garments, and lamps to complete the statue.
"Never did the Frogs attempt to put poker cards in her hand, the dunces," said Tex Garromond, editor of Poker Monthly. |
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